Hello, it’s Miw Speaking…

Hal-hal dibawah ini sangat mungkin bakal kejadian sama siapa aja -well, yang jelas sih sama saya udah!- so I will give you some how-to-tips to save your energy… so you can use it for some things more useful… like, keeping the world peace, for example!
Tips #1

If you happen to go to 21 Cineplex in Plasa Semanggi, and you bring your favourite drink from outside (coz y’know how expensive the 21’s cafe is…) and the security guy is asking you not to bring it along with you… rather than give it to him for free (just like Unduk did last month when we got busted), why don’t give him a cold-look in the eye, and ask him back, “Terus, Bapak mau nangkep saya?” and then walk right away, leave him in confusion. (Although my best suggestion for you is to bring a paper bag or a jacket and try to hide your belonging inside them, coz I don’t think it works anymore… they must’ve learned from me )

Tips #2

If you are in the middle of watching movie at the cinema, and your attention is distracted coz somebody calls you, and you think it’s a phone-call from a friend but turn to be a telemarketer who is offering you stuffs, my brilliant suggestion for you is : just put it away from your your ear but don’t hang up, let her speak about 10 seconds, and then say, “halo? halo, mbak?!? aduh suaranya putus-putus nih…” then you can hang it up

They surely won’t feel insulted (why would we? It’s what they do for a living!) but at the same time you are not running out more time watching the movie. It’s a win-win solution!

Tips #3

Now you walk in Centro Dept Store, and you happen to find these very-colorful-cotton-print-tube-tops with no brand label at some corner of the store and they give you 30% discount from the tag (Rp. 69.000), PLEASE DO NOT think that you’re very lucky finding ‘em coz actually you can buy ‘em only 35.000 rups at the Melawai (which, according to Niken, I should bid ‘em lower… damn!)

Tips #4

And when you are briskly walking in the plasa and then some salespeople -who are sometimes very, VERY ANNOYING- are pulling your nerves, like keep following you anywhere and offering you things when you have actually given a definitely-not-interested-whether-in-this-life-or-in-future-life sign, please do not hesitate to make a pause, turn your back and face them (you may also allow to point your finger if necessary) and say in deep, calm voice, “mas, kalo saya anggap mas ganggu saya, saya bisa panggilkan satpam, lho.” Those words surely work like a spell, especially when you are taller then them

Ok, itu dia tips-tips dari saya hari ini. Semoga bisa berguna buat temen-temen semua. Caiyyooo!!!

Menurut Majalah Bazaar edisi terbaru, ramalan bintang saya adalah :

“Anda perlu suasana membangun yang mampu menyegarkan pikiran Anda. Akan ada perubahan membahagiakan dalam kehidupan Anda. Tampaknya akan ada jalan keluar atas semua masalah rumit yang sedang Anda hadapi  belakangan ini.”

Kesimpulannya :

Asyiiikkkk… kayanya ada yg mau ngasih saya duit banyak neh, soalnya satu-satunya hal yang bisa nyegerin pikiran saya sekarang, dan membahagiakan, apalagi sampe ngasih jalan keluar, ya cuma duit.

CIHUYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!